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Conflict in Relationships: Keeping Friends and Having Boundaries
Do not let him build castles in the air if there is no attraction for you. If he is a friend, he knows you, so he will be able to know what you mean. But be honest, and keep that friendship.
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Conflict in Relationships: Meeting and Managing Expectations From In-laws
Your home should be a pleasing place for both your nuclear families, but nothing major should be approved without the two of you being in agreement.
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Conflict in Relationships: Drinking and Alcoholism
The cycle needs to end for the growth of both of you, not even about the children. Help him get that drive from himself because if he doesn't, he won't see the need to change.