Sex is an important part of our lives and it’s important in any relationship.
In the age of the orgasm gap, men want sex and women want love, we can all agree that sex feels great when both men and women are getting a great shared experience.
However this shared experience takes time and communication to cultivate and we have rounded up 10 ways in which you can spice up your love life. Turn these ways into sex habits and thank us later.
1. Spice It Up
After some time, the same styles get boring, and living in a sexless marriage is not fun either. Try different styles and change how you do things. It will take time, effort and coordination but it will be worth it.
2. Always Initiate
Don’t get in a deadlock of who’s going to initiate. Sex is not one of those things in which we make a duty timetable and decide who’s role it is to initiate. Relationships with healthy sex lives are those in which both partners initiate sex.
When you initiate, you make your partner feel wanted, desired and loved. Be very expressive of your sexual desires. In addition, initiating takes the pressure of your partner feeling rejected, boosts their confidence and strengthens your bond as a couple.
3. Let Your Partner Know Beforehand
As parents, serious career chasers and siblings, we have a lot in our minds. It’s important to ensure that the spark stays in the relationship and in your sex life.
As they say, foreplay starts when the last orgasm ends. Send your partner a sexy picture, a racy text or schedule a weekend away.
Foreplay starts before you get to the bedroom.
4. Wear Minimal Clothing To Bed
Unless you’re going mountaineering in your dreams, wear minimal clothing or nothing at all.
Seriously, clothes just get in the way.
In addition, you can wear something flimsy and sexy to look and feel the part.
5. Be Selfless
As with any performance, you have to engage and be engaged. Great sex is about understanding your partner’s body, their wants and what it takes to get them fulfilled.
No one likes to be in the receiving end of one-sided sex.
6. Be Confident
Your confidence will set the tone of how much you get and how much you receive. Make sure you’re not short-changing yourself or your partner by being less than confident.
Communication is very important in every relationship. It’s how we know our partner’s expectations and how we can meet them and if not, we can then have a come to Jesus moment about why we can’t meet them. Otherwise, unexpressed expectations always leads to unresolved tension which can lead to having a bad sex life.
Ask your partner what gets them going and until you express your concerns, don’t hold grudges when you feel your needs are not being met.
8. Be a Team Player
Know when to compromise, when to give and when to take. As Family Therapist Jane Kuria says, sometimes it’s good to have charity sex. Always be willing to give more than you can take and give with no expectations.
Learn what it will take to have a healthy sex life in your relationship, then do what you can to have it. It will take time, effort and hard work but it will be worth it.
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