Other Articles from Wangari Mwaura
CELEBRATING EVERY MOTHER
This Mother’s Day, I would like to take a little time to celebrate mothers. I will try to encompass every mother. Please forgive me if I leave anyone out and kindly add her in the comments section so we may celebrate her as every mother deserves celebrating.
To my mother.
How could I possibly put into words how I feel about her. She is a special woman. Not just your average kind of special or your everyday special, but truly remarkable. Her strength in taking on the seemingly impossible, her forgiveness of me when I went through a very nasty rebellious stage in my late teens/early 20s. Her grace in the face of my defiance. Her embracing me when I informed her (and my dad) that I was pregnant; standing by me and helping me overcome my fear. Her acceptance of my Richard and her love for him. Her nurturing words as I set off on my journey as a homemaker. Her love for my children; the special, super nutritious uji flour she has made for Kamau and the warm yarn sweaters she buys them. Her frequent phone calls. Especially those, because in my “too busy” life I have no time to call her yet she keeps calling to find out how I am doing. I want to be just like her. I really do. Whenever one of my siblings makes a comment and says, “that is so mom!” I embrace that. To be half the woman that she is would be one of the greatest blessings.
To the mother that had a normal delivery.
The one that pushed her baby (or babies) into the world. The one that went through hours of labour, afraid that the delivery would never come yet bravely soldiered on. To the mother that had a Caesarian Section- whether elective or because of a medical emergency. There is nothing to be ashamed about because you did not push or because your body didn’t go through labour. You are just as brave and just as special. Do not let anyone take that away from you. To the mother that went through IVF or surrogacy or adoption. Whatever your circumstance, enjoy being a mother to your children. You are wonderful. An inspiration.
To the mother going through post postpartum depression.
The one that waited for the love that she was told would hit her when she first held her little one, but didn’t feel it. The one that cries herself to sleep because she is so afraid that someone will realize how blue she feels when they all expect her to feel magical. The one that feels anxious and extremely helpless. Do not be afraid. It happens to the best of us. Talk to someone you love and trust. Take it a day at a time. You’ll see. In no time, you’ll be the wonderful mommy we all know you can be.
To the mother that was blessed to breastfeed her baby.
The one that struggled through the pain of her newborn learning to latch on. Give thanks that you have been able to and give it your very best. We know it’s not easy and we applaud your effort. To the mother that had to bottle feed; perhaps because baby didn’t quite take to the breast, or you didn’t have enough milk to satisfy baby’s needs, whatever your reason. The best decision you made was to put your pride aside and put your child’s needs first. Their being full is more important than any study or snide remarks society shoves your way.
To a special kind of mother; the one that is raising her children through chronic illness.
The breast cancer survivor that breastfed her baby on one breast due to a mastectomy on the other. The lupee that pushes through chronic pain to care for her children. All this despite the adversity you faced to be able to bring your children into the world. You are heroines. We are truly in awe of the special kind of brave that you are.
To the mother that made the decision to stay at home and raise her children.
The one that doesn’t get to have a day off. The one that is unappreciated and often taken for granted. The one that still gets asked what she does all day. Do not let society tell you who or what you ought to be. You have made the best decision for your children. Own it with great pride.
To the working mother.
The one that has to wake up early to beat traffic and gets home to, sometimes, find her little ones already asleep. The one that has to juggle office and school play outfit deadlines. The one that struggles to enjoy a win at work because she worries she is failing on the home front. Take a moment to just appreciate yourself. Stop beating yourself up. Forget those unbelievably high standards you have set for yourself and accept you cannot do everything. Delegate a little- both at the office and at home- and be the best working mother that you can be.
To the single mother.
The one that was pregnant alone or the one that was suddenly alone because being with that person was no longer the right choice for her. The one that has to wear both the mommy and the daddy hat. We salute how hard you are working to raise your children- to give them everything a two-parent home has. You are, indeed, special for it is difficult enough with a partner. Remember to take a little time for yourself too.
To the mothers that lost their little ones before they met them.
The ones that were bursting with excitement when the pregnancy test read positive. The ones that rubbed their bellies with love and dreamed about cradling their little ones. Take heart. It may not feel like it, but it gets better. Truly. Your time will come. Have faith. Mine did.
Finally, to the mothers we have lost.
Some that we never got to meet as they gave their lives so we could have ours. We know you loved us. Even though we do not know you, we are because you were. We are hopeful that someday we will get to meet you. To those that raised us yet left too soon. You live within us. A candle in our hearts that burns forever. Your laugh is still with us for when we think of you we only think of the beauty you brought to our lives. We pray for you every single day and hope to see you again.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Read more from Wangari’s Blog.